Welp, It’s Almost Summer, But My Winter Body Didn’t Get The Memo

Photo Credit: TLC/patdollard.com/via giphy.com

The great Honey Boo Boo Chile once said, and I quote, “Mo’ butter, Mo’ better.”  To be honest, I totally agree – but my waistline sure doesn’t. *insert struggle face emoji here*

So at the beginning of the year, like most of you, I had a long list of super obnoxious 2016 resolutions.  At the top of the list was, you guessed it, getting fit and fab for the summer.  I’m talkin straight up ‘Ivy Park Beyonce Body Goals’ over here.  So I signed up for that good ol’ Planet Fitness membership (BALLIN . . . on a budget that is) and went to the gym on January 3rd (yes, I remember the exact date).   Sad to say, I literally have not been back.  WHO DOES THAT? I legit went to the gym ONCE since January.


When I first moved to NYC, knowing how healthy-conscious this city was, I had all these glorious plans to continue my workout regimen and healthy eating habits.  However, once I realized how f*cking good, plentiful and readily available the food is here, that all went straight to hell.  It’s just too easy to eat tasty food here (Seamless is essentially Satan).  I mean come on, there’s a f*cking pizza shop on every block – NYC just doesn’t play fair! It’s a serious problem for someone like me, whose discipline is essentially non-existent. ?


gifbay.com/via giphy.com

Anyway, as the months are quickly passing by, I realize the end of April is near and, well, I’m still f*ckin fat.  I have no one to blame but myself, but that doesn’t mean I can’t do anything about it!  I don’t really have any insightful advice or anything to give you guys, but below is what I plan to do in the next couple months to get my fat ass back on track!

  1. Get back to clean eating starting Monday ASAP
  2. Drinking a gallon of water daily
  3. Work out 4 times a week minimum
  4. Obsess over Beyonce, and aspire to get those “Lemonade” body goals  ??
  5. Stop eating bullshit
  6. Literally stop my addiction to fries (it’s definitely a problem)
  7. Stop going to brunch so much? Ugh, fuck.
  8. Cook more

I promise I’m going to start the above on Monday tomorrow! Stay tuned for my progress!

xoxo ?



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