too old for the club scene

11 Signs That You’re Just Too Old To Club

Started wearing more and going out less. Oh, how the tables have turned! Yep, you just might be too old to club.

If you asked me a few years ago if I would ever get tired of going out, I would’ve said B*TCH, ARE YOU INSANE? I mean seriously, you couldn’t keep me in the house on a Friday or Saturday night.  And if you did, I had one serious case of FOMO (fear of missing out).

too old to club

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Nowadays, it’s like pulling teeth to get me OUT of the house on a weekend.  Idk what happened – I just woke up one day and was like, eh.  And then poof! My “club mojo” was completely and irreversibly non-existent.

However, in the months leading up to that moment, there were a few signs indicating that my ass was getting too old to club.

1 – No matter how many drinks I had, clubbing just wasn’t fun.

There’s nothing worse than getting tipsy and still not having a good time. What a waste.

too old to club

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2 – I no longer recognized anyone.

Going out used to mean reuniting with old friends – but then it became, “Who TF are these people?”

too old to club

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3 – I couldn’t relate to any of the songs.

I meannnnn, who is Young Thug, and why is he rapping about shrimp dips?

too old to club

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4 – I started feeling self-conscious in tight ass clothing.

Those cheapy-cheap Forever 21 bodycon jawns just didn’t cut it anymore.  I take that back – they were actually cutting into my love handles,  so then yea.  That was that.

too old to club

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5 – I started judging other girls in tight ass clothing.

Who raised you?!

too old to club

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6 – I got annoyed when guys tried to dance with me.

Like, how dare you try to dance with me at a club!

too old to club

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7 – Standing in line for a club just wasn’t worth it.

I’m sorry – wait in what line?

too old to club

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8 – Literally yawning about 15 minutes in.

too old to club

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9 – Habitual complaining.

My feet hurt. I have a headache. I’m hungry. You name it, I complained about it.

too old to club

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10 – Seriously was about to spazz if one more drunk person stepped on my toe. 

too old to club

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11 – I couldn’t stop thinking about all the food I was missing out on. 

I seriously could’ve been home watching Netflix and getting my eat on. This is bullsh*t.

too old to club

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If you’ve ever felt this way, then guess what? You too, are getting too old to club! 😂😩

xoxo💋,

Mizzez_Lola_modified_2_z

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